Saturday, December 31, 2011

What is it?




As I walk in the rain, the clouds wetting my cheek-
As my heart writhes in pain, and I feel my voice going weak-
As my mind goes blank, the soft slush greasing my feet-
What makes me feel one with them? Where do the feelings and the feeler meet?



As I run in the sun, the sky splashes on my shoulder-
As my spirit is ebullient, and everything I behold is brighter-
As my soul soaks in the music, the evening charm and the fluttering leaves-
What is it that springs with joy? Who is it who this wonder perceives?



As I sleep in the shade, my body in slumber’s tender embrace-
As my hidden impulses weave a world; my mind unshackled , 
and dissolved duress-
As I wade through the magical; the world of unmet desires I tread-
Who is awake to them? What connects them to this world-
as if an invisible thread?

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Religion and Spirituality






Two terms, Spirituality and Religion, deeply connected,  but yet leaves behind a very different taste in our mouths.



We come across surveys that tell us more and more people, at least in the urban areas, feel more and more comfortable identifying themselves as "spiritual"  than as "religious".


What is the essential disconnect between being spiritual and being religious?What is the basis of this dichotomy? Which practices, which beliefs, which ideas differentiate one from the other? Is there anyway we can be spiritual and religious at the same time?


These are my random thoughts on these two terms, though viscerally joined, yet almost separated at birth.




What is common between Religion and Spirituality?


Belief is the basis of all religions; just as spirituality cannot do away with faith.


Hope is an essential nature of the religious; just as someone spiritual cannot but be an optimist.


A sense of sacredness, auspiciousness is common to both religion and spirituality.


Both makes its adherent aware of his/her being part of something bigger than themselves.


And both , in their own ways, provide a meaning to their lives.


And how are they different?


Religion is a shared identity; while spirituality is a deeply personal exploration.


Religion is mostly inherited; while spirituality is essentially an individual construct.


Religion needs a temple, a church or a mosque; while spirituality is nourished by silence and blossoms in  nature.


Religion seeks for guidance without; while spirituality seeks for light within.


Religion needs an organization,a structure; while spirituality needs aloneness, freedom.


Religion satisfies the primal urge of belonging and communality; while spirituality tries to quench the eternal thirst for knowledge and meaning.


Religion demands compliance, obedience and loyalty; while spirituality urges keenness, passion and courage.


Religion needs god(s), scriptures, commandments; while spirituality seeks experience, transcendence, an awakened conscience.


Religion provides security, certainty; while spirituality demands a spirit of probing and inquiry.


Religion offers answers to questions; while spirituality seeks questions to answers.


Religion tells you about your destination; while spirituality urges you to take the journey.






Just as one cannot take away "ritual" from "spiritual", Religion not resulting in Realization is as good as being worthless.


A great master once quipped  "It is all right to be born in a religion, but not to die in one". What did he mean?


While religion provides us the initial guidance, sets us on the path of self-discovery, gives us encouragement and direction, protects us from our baser instincts, instills in us a sense of right and wrong, makes us aware of a higher purpose - eventually it should lead us to an inner journey of seeking, encourage in us a deep yearning for that transcendental experience that all religions talk about, put us on a personal exploration shorn off all prejudice, narrowness and division. An unripe fruit is bitter and unwholesome; similarly religion which has not ripened into spirituality, more often than not is sullied with the bitter taste of a misplaced sense of ego. "My path is the BEST path"  if not, "My Path is the ONLY path"! And this pernicious if subtle ego, manifests into a self-righteous prudishness at its best, and a dogmatic parochialism, narrowness and bigotry at its worst.


We are all born with the seed of self-inquiry sown into our hearts. Religion, which was meant to provide the initial protection to the sprouting seed of spirituality, most of the time ends up in stunting if not stifling the blossoming of the sprout. We should be ever more vigilant to see that this seed with all its magnificent potentiality, grows up into a mighty tree, drawing its sustenance from deep within, and providing coolness and refuge to our wary spirit.


Has not all the great masters and founders of religions, done exactly that?








Thursday, December 22, 2011

Peace

                          


Shaanti (Peace) is not just an external polish, which can be put on or brushed off.


It is not the same as fortitude, like that which young Yudhishtira had when he bore without a tear or a gasp the hundred blows with a cane administered to test his stamina.


It is not the resignation which come of frustrated ambition or satisfied desire.


It is an ennobling, elevating experience which comes when one attains the merger with the very source of one's being. It is the stilling of the waves; the calming of mental activities and agitations.


Sathya Sai Speaks Vol 2 ( 40. Unfurl it on your consciousness.)




How do we attain this Peace?


Everyone seeks and strives to be at peace with themselves and with their communities around.


People have tried to get this peace by accumulating wealth, which give power over others and ability to command conveniences and comforts.


Some have sought positions of authority and influence, so they can shape events suited to one's aims and fancies.


Unfortunately, these paths are beset with fear, and the peace that is secured thereby is liable to quick and sometimes violent extinction.


Real peace can be achieved only through Love!


It is the fruit of the tree of life. 


This fruit with the sweet essence is encased in a bitter skin. The bitter skin is symbolic of the six evil passions that encase the loving heart of man: lust, anger, greed, attachment, pride and hate.


Those who remove the exterior through hard and consistent discipline attains the sweetness inside - the much desired peace; this peace is everlasting, unchanging and overwhelming.


Sri Sathya Sai Baba (Jan 1, 1971).





Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Reason is the illusion of Reality





  Reason and reality: these are the two parameters we constantly invoke in our post modern lives to validate and justify all that we think and all that we do. Such is the absolute power of these two concepts on our minds that even our Gods and our innermost dreams have to pass the twin tests:  Are they reasonable? Are they realistic? We might use other words in their place: “scientific”, “rational”, “practical”, “pragmatic”, but all of them convey the same meaning. In all our experiences, and in all our conscious responses to them, we try to satisfy ourselves that they have the twin blessings of reality and rationality.

      When these ideas of reason and reality are of so paramount importance in the way we live our lives, or rather in the way we think and make sense of things that are happening around us, let us ask ourselves: what do these words actually mean?

Reality:

What is reality? What are the things we consider as real, and what do we brush aside as unreal? In common parlance the state of things that actually exists out there are considered as real.  How do we know what is actually existing out there? By our experience, we quip. But then do the dreams that we all experience while sleeping qualify as being real? No! we gasp! Dreams are imaginations of our minds, we reason, an experience that holds true only for the one who is dreaming, that too while sleeping. It has no truth once he wakes up. So for something to be real, it should not be an individual experience, it should be a shared experience. It should not be born out of the mind, it should be grasped by the mind. In fact, what we really mean is that reality remains reality whether we are observant or oblivious of it. It is that state of things which is out there in spite of us, independent of us.

Let us try to understand and analyze some universally accepted “real” events that pass these tests of objectivity. The rising of the sun in the eastern horizon and its setting in the west, is something we all experience. But the reality we know is on the contrary. The sun doesn’t rise, neither does it set. It is the earth that goes around it and we it's inhabitants, delude ourselves with the experience of the rising and the setting sun. Though now this is primary school knowledge, humanity actually got to know and accept this “reality”  after much resistance and hesitation only five centuries ago. So we see, that shared experience can be far removed from reality. It is not experience per se, but a deeper understanding of that experience that qualify as reality.

There can be other examples. The blue ocean in reality is a colorless mass of water,the blueness is because of the reflection of the blue sky. The flatness of the earth, moving trees we see while traveling in a train, passage of time when waiting for a loved person, are all far from what the reality is. So we see this criteria of shared or personal experience as defining something as real may be misleading at best, delusional at worst. 

    Let us consider another example. A piece of cloth. Whether one has observed it or not, whether one has touched it or not, it doesn’t alter the state of its reality a bit. It remains a darn piece of cloth. Now what is this piece of cloth in reality? Well one might say it is a collection of threads interwoven to give us something we call cloth. So a piece of cloth in reality is just a bundle of interwoven threads. Now it doesn’t end there. One really persistent reality-seeker will prop in that what appears as threads in reality is nothing but cotton. So what we observed as a piece of cloth, we have now realized in reality is nothing but cotton. So reality here turns out to be different levels of observations. 


Can this be called different stages of reality, where the higher stage doesn’t contradict the earlier stage, but subsumes it with itself? Whatever it is, we see that there can be multiple way of making sense of the same reality. Reality is not a frozen and rigid thing.

   But this idea of going to the next basic level of reality of a substance can be extended even further. Cotton is made up of molecules, molecules are made up of atoms, atoms are made up of empty space and a sprinkling of electrons, protons and neutrons, which are in turn made up of the mysterious quarks and gluons, and finally if we believe and follow today’s physicists we conclude they are nothing but wave forms of energy giving us an illusion of matter. Lo and behold! Searching for reality we end up in illusion! But alas! This is the true picture of reality we obtain when we try to zero in on a substance, removed from the personal experience of it, dissecting it with the impassionate zeal of objectivity at the altar of impersonal physics and mathematics. We wanted reality, pure and non-corrupt, and we got it!

   Now surely this is not what we meant when we started out on our quest for reality! Matter may be mainly empty space and swirling waves of energy, but it is evidently not the first thing that comes to our mind when we talk of it. 


  What is then real in our everyday life, can be alternatively explained by two conditions. They are the information and impulses we receive though our senses that has the property of repeatability and a rational/logical meaning to it. 


  Now agreeing with this definition of reality, let us consider we have a nice smooth red ball in our hands. If I hand over this ball to my friends, they would all agree with me that it’s a nice little red ball. The ball remains nice and red now, tomorrow, next week, as long as I don’t break it or paint it blue. So with our agreed definition, this little red ball is a real thing. 


The realness of it consists of its color, its shape and the material it is made up of.


 Let’s first look into the reality of the color. What is the reality of its redness?  Redness is nothing but an experience that is triggered by certain receptors in our retina when light rays or energy of certain frequency or wavelength falls on our optic nerves and is carried as electro-magnetic waves to them. The wavelength was not red in color, neither the receptors, nor the optic nerves. The redness is purely a quality that arises in the mind. So what is the real color of the ball independent of our experience, repeated, shared, logical?


 Similarly the shape of the ball which is so real to us is also the way our mind interprets the impulses it receives from the real shape of the ball. Is there any way we can experience the reality out there independent of our mind, independent of our consciousness?

  Then of course there is the question of the real world out there: the real world where, we are told, every one is up against every one in their struggle for existence, the real world where material possession and power are the prime motivators of most human endeavors, the real world, where each one pursues his or her “self-interest”,when more often than not, it is actually at odds with another person's self-interest.


    The real world where every one goes on living a life as if death is the most unreal, uncertain thing. In this rush for accumulating and achieving, the fragility and fleeting nature of life do not register as real.


    But what can be farther away from reality? We all “know” death is the only certainty, the only constant factor of life. But in our conception of reality, we choose to remain oblivious to it. The mermaids, the fairies, the angels, the demons that were so real co-inhabitants of our world when we were kids, we realize were fantastic ideas and products of fertile imagination of our tender minds, which have no reality with our advanced understanding of the nature of reality. 


Is this not the case also that in our being grounded in “reality” as we understand it, the things we consider as  real beyond doubt, are also  elaborate imaginations we have constructed for ourselves to remain secured in the state of delusion we find ourselves so comfortably ensconced?

Reason:

Reasoning is born out of the assumption that everything we see around us has a coherent and connected meaning to them, a meaning we have the cognitive ability to grasp and make sense. Barring from a few self-evident events and phenomenona, like the fact that we exist and are self-aware, we try to understand everything within this logical framework of thinking we call reasoning.

  But what is interesting is to note that reason is a product of our thinking, a “logical” way of explaining things we see around us.


 Let me illustrate with an example. The reason why planets orbit around the Sun, we were told by Newton, is the force of gravitation. But then almost three centuries down the line, Einstein came and explained, that the real reason the planets orbit around the sun is not because of gravitation, but it is because the space on which the planets rest is curved because of their mass and hence it appears that the planets are orbiting round the sun, while they are only moving in a straight line on that curved space. 


So we see the reasons behind the things we observe and experience change with our increased understanding of them.


 No longer is the reason for an eclipse a huge snake swallowing the sun, but it is because the moon comes in between.

   Every event we witness, every experience we have, we want to believe that there is a reason behind it. And more importantly we believe as if instinctively that this reason is comprehensible. 


Either we have already made it out, or with furtherance of knowledge, we are sure, we will make it out. This optimism about our power of reasoning is the motivation behind all scientific enquiry.


 In our ever broadening field of experience and reasoning, we come up with new reasons to explain the same phenomenon. What is today’s reason was yesterday’s fantasy and may be tomorrow’s naiveté. 


How can we be so certain about the rectitude of today’s reasoning then? All we can say is that this is how we understand it today. That’s all!

  Now let us consider another situation. Suppose, in a room water is boiling in a kettle. Three persons come in and they are asked the reason for it. 


The first person, with all his scientific knowledge, says that it is boiling because the molecules are in an energized state.


 The second person walks in and reasons that it is the fire under the kettle which is making the water to boil. 


The third person, who had actually put the kettle of water on the oven, has his own reason though. He says the water is boiling because he wants to have some tea. 


Now which reason is more acceptable? Or which reason do we put aside as unreasonable?


 Here we see an example of reason being subject to the observer. We find the reason for an event, that suits our subjectivity. If in the earlier example we saw one reason superseding another, here we see multiple reasons being perfectly reasonable at the same time.

     But the most remarkable thing about reason is not that it is neither final nor is that it is not unique. It is this belief about reason that it has to accompany our every experience. What makes us so certain that every experience we have should have an underlying reason? And if there is one, how do we know we are actually wired to make it out? 

   The reason that we have synthesized with our reality, both stands on foundations that are far from solid. They are subject to subjectivity, interpretation and change. Both are intensely a product of human experience. Hence there is no way we can conclude there is a finality to them. The number of questions they answer are minuscule in comparison to the questions they have no answer for. 


This being the case, is it too presumptuous to say, “Reason is the illusion of reality”? 


June, 2008.



Monday, December 19, 2011

The Goddamn Particle!




         Last week there was a curious piece of news tucked inside the pages of the newspaper (or if you watch TV for your news, briefly flashed between much more important news of Anna’s latest threat or Rahul Gandhi’s latest night out at some dalit village). It was that the scientists, feverishly smashing protons into one another in the mind-boggling CERN Lab, a 17 mile round particle accelerator, excitedly announced that they were  almost on the verge of discovering the elusive “God-particle”!  I wondered what is this goddamn “God-particle”? And sifting through esoteric stuff I found online on the topic, this is basically what I made of it.

       Our middle school science teachers have taught us that matter is made up of molecules, which are in turn made up of atoms; atoms are made up of protons, electrons and neutrons.  Our Science teachers are most likely to have stopped here, and with that all-knowing smirk on their face, so characteristic of Science (and Maths) teachers, had drifted on to the next chapter. But for the curious few, we got to know that protons and neutrons (electrons are basically inconsequential when considering building blocks of matter) , are in fact made up of fuzzy things called quarks (there are six different types of them) and gluons (eight of them). Now can they be broken up even further into smaller more fundamental particles or does it end here? I can assure you that no physicist, worth the name, can come out with an unambiguous answer to this question.

        But the fun only begins here. These sub-atomic particles to have the properties they have, and whatever else the scientists have been able to find out about them using their fancy mathematical models, is theoretically condemned to be actually mass-less!  In other words, if our physicists had their way, the Universe, we, our laptop, would actually be non-existent!  

       And here it is that our dear scientist Mr. Peter Higgs enters the picture and conjures up a particle -the God-particle (also known as the Higgs particle for the less sensational among us) and an all-pervasive force-field associated with it, it’s mysterious presence permeating everything all over the Universe.  It’s nature is to cling to the fundamental particles wherever they are, dragging on them and making them heavy. Not all particles though, find them equally sticky. Light or photon particles hardly care for them, while some other particles wade through them like an elephant in tar. So what it means is that fundamental particles actually weigh nothing, but somehow just as the Higgs field, a consequence of God-particle, is turned on (and the best guess is that it happened soon after the Big Bang!), these particles acquire their mass!  And we have our sun and our moon, and everything else.

        So mystery solved? The chicken soup tastes fantastic, its only that the chicken is missing!  Everything is perfect, its only that this goddamn God-particle is just nowhere to be found! And hence the frantic search and the feverish pitch on almost a super-human scale in the CERN laboratory! Because unless it is found, for all it knows, Physics just has no clue to confront the most fundamental experience-that we exist as flesh and bones, if not as spirit!


Sources:


Sunday, December 18, 2011

2011: A reflection

Another two weeks I have to endure you,
How I wish you were gone by now-
Harsh it may seem, a misplaced colored view!
But can you deny, I was richer when you came,
Much poorer as you prepare at last to withdraw!

Yes, I know what you would say-
Some sunny mornings, carefree nights and some wishes coming true.
Some new friends, some glimmer of love, also an occasional bright ray.
You brought me back home, to my roots-
Fragrance of a wisp of rain, a clear starry night, a morning wet with dew.

But, this Sunday afternoon as I sit and rewind-
I can’t deny a feeling of loss, a keen if subtle hint of pain.
On a difficult day, as you long for your lost innocence, for the childhood you’ve left behind-
The finality of their loss dawns on you, and the gaping void only grows wider;
No more playing in the sun, or with no weariness in the shoulder running in the rain!

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Why I would not visit an astrologer...


No I'm not so arrogant to say that its all mumbo-jumbo. Neither can I say I'm not curious. Nor am I so secured in my present moment, that sometimes I would not wonder "Ah if only I knew what lies ahead"! But in spite of the occasional temptations, I feel a very strong inner resistance to anything that deals with fortune telling. And these are my reasons.

Firstly, I feel there is something right about the way we are kind of stuck in the present moment. In spite of all the burden of past memories we carry, there is an undeniable feeling of optimism in our heart. In spite of our past failures, there is something inside that tells us may be this time we would succeed. In spite of all the disappointments, we are not so disheartened so as to give up another try. Tomorrow always seems to hold a better promise than yesterday. This intrinsic optimism, I believe is built into our system, so as to give us the strength to pull ourselves up and carry on, even in the face of dire difficulties. Obviously there are a few who find the strain of the present moment so unbearable that they give up- but aren't they the exceptions rather than the rule? Life often comes across as a sea of mundaneness and indifference, if not hostility, where we frequently find ourselves submerged and struggling, but somehow we assure ourselves that there is a westerly wind of good tidings heading our way, which will keep us afloat, if not take us ashore, someday. Would unshackled knowledge of the future not rob us of this indefatigable source of strength and hope we carry in our bosom?

Secondly, I find it a highly odd if not impossible to reconcile my faith in Divinity and the Theory of Karma with the desire to know what lies ahead in the hope of adjusting it, if not changing it completely. I believe that whatever I face today and whatever I will have to face tomorrow are only reactions to my past actions. This is the unalterable and un-exonerative law of Karma. What lies ahead I cannot change, but the test of my faith in Divinity lies in how courageously and with how much equanimity I face them, with the awareness that it is I alone who have constructed them with with the web of my past thoughts, words and deeds. Grounded in this belief, would it not be totally absurd to consult an astrologer to know if stellar movements are responsible for all my woes and worries and wear colorful stones as remedial measures? Few things surprise me more than the oddity of co-existence of faith in Divinity and astrology, that I come across so often in so many people, blissfully unaware of the inherent contradiction!

And lastly, deep in my heart something prods me not to take life as seriously as we tend to take most of the time. Even a cursory comparison on the scale of our existence with that of the expansive universe would reveal to us how utterly insignificant we are in the grand scheme of things. It would reveal how puerile it is to give the inordinate amount of importance we attribute to our lives and its trappings, when truly its not worth even a trifle, once all of existence is taken into account. It would reveal how delusionally inflated our sense of self and ego is, that we can't but laugh at the stupidity of it. Even a little pondering on this line would make us realize that in stead of the importance and centrality we have accorded to our lives, at the end of the day, life is nothing but a game, to be played by the rules, enjoy the thrill, and return home when the play is over. What fun will be left of it if we get to know the scorecard before hand?


Saturday, December 10, 2011

Submission!

My passions plunder my heart,
My eyes long for trash,
Ashamed I am of my hidden desires,
Afraid of the fire getting covered with filthy ash!

The instincts interred deep inside,
The tendencies lurking below the surface,
All my efforts, all my worship,
How weak you are in their face!

In this battle I long for You o Lord,
Not only for words, but also for strength..
By myself I can only go so far,
Protect me from myself!

Window or Mirror?

The other day we had cross-cultural training at our office. The main intention was to orient us, the employees to a global work-place, to implant in our awareness the sensitivity required in dealing with global counterparts, to sensitize us about the different contexts and cultural experiences that shape us and the people with whom we interact and how that seeps into our inter-personal engagements, often subconsciously, both at the professional as well as at the personal level.

We were told how the way we dress, what we eat, the idioms we use in our conversations- in one word,what we mean by "culture", is only the tip of an ice-berg-a very small fraction of what culture really is. Most of it lies hidden below the surface. The religion, the politics, the geography, the history-that is the stuff culture is really made up of. Is it any wonder that the very phrase "tip of an ice-berg" hardly has a counterpart in any of the Indian languages, copious as they are in their collection of idioms and metaphors?

One interesting thing that came out of the training was that when we label and describe an alien culture, or for that matter even another person, how subconsciously we reveal more of ourselves and our culture than that of our subject. When we say "Americans are very punctual", doesn't it mean that for an average Indian punctuality is still a matter of aspiration? When an American gets startled about our extended families, isn't it that it is their notion of family that comes out? Is not all our judgements and opinions of other people a function of who we are rather than an objective statement on them?

We were shown three pictures one after another and told to see how we reacted to them. One was what looked like a call center work-place, where scores of employees were busy with their work in their boxed cubicles. The isolation and staidness of the place was more than evident. The second picture was that of an old rustic lady, in her indigenous attire, awkwardly holding a cell-phone, but totally submerged in a conversation. The third was a picture of a group of carefree urchins, with twinkling eyes and an infectious, enviable joy splashed on their face. Their dusty if not impoverished surrounding, it seems, have totally failed to have any effect on their cherubic spirit. We were asked what we made of those pictures. And interestingly, each one of us had our own take on the pictures. While the call-center office space reminded some of a night-job culture, for another it brought out a sense of alienation and boredom. To one girl the picture of the old lady was reminiscent of her old grandma, while in total contrast to someone else it was the story of diffusion of technology in rural India. The children with their innocent smiles reminded some of their own childhood and a sparked a longing to be there once again.

Curiously it was evident that the pictures represented a different story, a different meaning, evidenced a different reaction in each one of us. So the pictures that we saw, were they windows to the outside world, or were they more like mirrors, reflecting back to us our own experiences, our memories and our deepest desires?

What is true for the pictures, is it also not mostly true for the world around us?



Friday, December 9, 2011

Coming back...


It's been sometime since I have come to this space. The initial motive and inspiration for this blog having dissipated I needed something else to motivate to come back here. All this while life has meandered around myriad events, different people, varying states of mind. But the perennial continuity that mysteriously binds all things together, isn't it more real than all the change and flux?

Now that I am back, I wish to orient this space as a medium of my self-expression. My dreams and thoughts, my hopes and aspirations, my expectations and heartbreaks, my confusions and realizations, would it not be fascinating to record them for posterity? If life is a journey, then this will be my travelogue. If life is a game, then this will be my commentary. If life is a dream, then this will be my dream-scape.